圖/文 陶維極 G.B. Talovich
　

The question arises, do we really need signs posted with incomprehensible words? How much English do we need in Taiwan? I'd rather people knew how to pronounce the 26 letters of the alphabet reasonably correctly. Otherwise, every time I have to recite English letters, nobody here understands me, and I adamantly refuse to pronounce N as 恩 or G as 居!!
Anybody who uses English should know that TB means tuberculosis. TB is hardly an inviting abbreviation for the Taipei Biennial. I wonder how many people wanted to come? Not me!
I get a big kick out of the signs on trash cans that say “一般垃圾 GENERAL GARBAGE”. Every time I see this label, I can't help standing at attention and saluting the trash can. “General Garbage, Private Talovich reporting, sir.” Ok, so how do you say一般垃圾, then? One word: trash.
Some labels are just sloppy. An ATM slot is labeled CASH SOLT. One bus had a big sign announcing: 謝謝! THARK YOU! Thark you? That sounds like a dirty word, not something you should say in public!
　

譯 / 陶維極 G.B. Talovich

我們該檢討，我們真的需要到處貼不成文的告示嗎？我們在臺灣，需要多少英文？我個人認為，如果大家能夠把二十六個字母唸的像英文的話，就阿彌陀佛！不然，我每次要講英文字母，沒有人聽懂；打死我也不肯把n念成「恩」、把g念成「居」！！

用英文的人都應該知道，TB是肺結核的意思。台北雙年展寫成TB，讓人裹足不前；有人來參加嗎？我不敢！

看到垃圾桶註明：一般垃圾 GENERAL GARBAGE，真要把我笑死！我忍不住，立正，敬禮！「廚餘將軍，陶維極下士報告！」好了，別鬧了，「一般垃圾」該怎說呢？一個字：trash.

很多標誌寫的不夠謹慎。自動提款機的現金取出口寫CASH SOLT。公車門邊寫「謝謝! THARK YOU!」當然，「謝謝」這個詞屬于比較艱深的英文，難免不熟悉、拼錯，可是Thark you聽起來像罵人的髒話，公共場所不該講！
　

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